What to do If You Underperform in Bed

Every guy thinks they’re awesome in bed. Unfortunately, most of them aren’t. Just because it’s easier for a guy to get off than it is for a woman doesn’t mean guys are better by default. It actually means that guys need to work harder in order to be good at it. Nobody wants to hear that they’re terrible in bed, but if a woman isn’t getting hers she’s going to let you know. This doesn’t mean that you’re doomed to make women laugh every time you get in bed with them. Instead, take what you’re told and work on getting better.

Listen to Her

“Find out what she likes first”
If you’re really not getting her off and it’s obvious, it’s time to talk to her about it. Ask her what it is in particular that you are or aren’t doing that isn’t working for her. Whatever she tells you, don’t take it as an insult. Instead, ask her what she’d like you to do. Better yet, ask her to show you. Women’s bodies don’t come with a manual, so if there’s a way she likes to be touched, the best way to learn it is to get her to demonstrate. Being willing to listen to what she’d like will let her know that you’re serious about pleasing her. It’ll also help you learn to be more receptive to what makes women hot and what doesn’t.

Take Your Time

Sex isn’t about length and duration for guys. A man’s default wiring makes them want hard sex that leads to a fast orgasm. Unfortunately, good sex for a woman is pretty much the exact opposite. Instead of forgetting about everything instead of how good your dick feels, try to keep in mind that you need to make her lady parts feel good too. Slow things down. Making love is more conducive to making her enjoy herself than a quickie is. Once you’ve gotten her off, you can focus on getting yours.

Don’t Be Afraid to Ask

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“You can’t afford to be shy now”
One of the easiest ways to improve your performance is to ask what she likes. This includes fantasies or fetishes. Invite her to share everything that turns her on and then do the same. If you both have an interest in BDSM, you can explore that fetish together. Even if she’s interested in some kind of kink that you aren’t, trying it out is going to get her all kind of hot and bothered, which in turn is going to make it easier to please her.

Surprise Her

Women love to be surprised. Get her in the mood with gifts of lingerie or a sex toy. Invite her over to your place and present her with a romantic meal complete with candles and mood music. Treating her well and making her feel sexy is going to make her want you. If she’s aroused, she’ll feel more pleasure than if she’s just kind of turned on. Surprises don’t have to be limited to special days like anniversaries or birthdays. She might appreciate it most when it comes in the middle of the week. Make her feel sexy every day.

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